Whispers of the Spirit

by Anne Apple

In May, our family hosted a graduation celebration which happened to coincide with the eve of our eldest daughter's confirmation. The invitation to this graduation party included an Emerson quote, “What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” Our party was for two particular youth, Ryan and Meghan, who had been part of our worshiping lives when we lived in Mobile ten years ago and with whom we'd stayed connected while they were students at Rhodes College .

When I left Mobile to go to seminary, the Junior High PYC gave me a journal and a framed picture. This picture hangs in our laundry room within our 'family collage.' The frame actually includes two pictures; one is our youth group at a swim party with Ryan dog paddling, front and center, and the other is Meghan and I, locked in a hug in front of the 'faith quilt' wall we had painted in the youth room. In the journal Ryan scribed, “Good luck. I hope you come back and visit.” Meghan scribed, “Thanks so much for what you've done this year. I had so much fun in confirmation and youth group with you!”

As Jim and I prepared the graduation dinner we began remembering how our lives had been woven together with Ryan's and Meghan's families. Ryan's father, Robert, had been one of the first people we told about our family going to seminary as we sat at a table in a place called Lakeside Lodge, crying, scared about God's call. Ryan always was, and still is, Reggie's little brother. At my ordination, Reggie had written on my stole, “I'm coming after you. ~Reg” Now we know the truth of Reggie's words as we'll celebrate his ordination to the Ministry of Word and Sacrament this summer.

We also remembered Mark, Ryan's good friend and fellow confirmand who traveled with Ryan's parents to Memphis for graduation and would be with us at dinner. Unlike Ryan, Mark pushed every leader's button that a sixth grade boy intuitively knows how to push! We laughed out loud remembering the story of Mark rolling down the 'dog-walk' hill at a rest area on the way home from a ski trip. To his credit, as Mark began the roll he hadn't made the connection to the risks associated with such action, as those in the car afterwards intimately knew. The beauty of this particular knowledge is that Mark is now serving as a Director of Youth Ministry!

With intention, we turned to remembering Meghan. Betsy and James had joined us in the kitchen to help prepare the meal so they joined us in our remembering. The spring before her freshman year at Rhodes Meghan called to talk with us about Rhodes. We assured her we thought it would be a great fit and encouraged her to give it a shot. After all, we said to her, you can do your laundry at our house and go to church with us! And selfishly we were thinking and you can “baby sit our three beautiful children” two of whom you remember as toddlers but are now young adolescents!

Meghan did worship with us regularly and we settled into a rhythm of eating Sunday dinner together. Meghan is part of our family, and was an important part of a confirmation teaching team for two years before she began working with the Junior Highs or as we call them the 'quest' kids. As a parent, one of my fondest memories is going down into the basement to pick up James after a Wednesday night program. As I opened the door, there was Meghan with an open Bible in her lap and the quest kids, including our James, sitting at her feet listening. Meghan was teaching our twelve year old son, just as we'd taught her when she was twelve.

James added, “I like the way Meghan has structure to her program. She uses the Bible and always starts and ends with prayer.” Then Betsy sheepishly revealed, “When I got asked out on my first date in seventh grade and I didn't want to tell you, I called Meghan.” This is where Jim and I stopped in the kitchen, amazed at the revelation from our teenage daughter and whispered a silent thank you before God for Meghan's mentoring.

On the advent of our call to ministry, Ryan had written the words, “Come back and visit with us.” Living out that call to ministry, much further down the road, in the act of preparing a party for him, we did come back and visit. What we realized, as we looked back on our own past, and looked at our children, is that in a family of faith, it is truly a 'family' and that the 'teaching' generation is frequently halfway between the parents and their children. We couldn't be the parents we are without the help of youth, now young adults, like Meghan, Ryan, Reggie and Mark ... for how they taught us, and continue to teach us.

Our reflection leaves us in a place of gratitude for the communities of faith we have been called to, from Marietta, to Mobile and Memphis. Through these families of faith, we know the steadfast love of God who works from generation to generation.

Anne Apple is Parish Associate at Idlewald Presbyterian Church in Memphis, TN.